Love is temporary insanity curable by marriage.
Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you.
I'm not paranoid! Which of my enemies told you this?
I like work. It fascinates me. I sit and look at it for hours.
Maturity, maturity, wherefore art thou maturity?! Deny thy intelligence, and refuse thy age...! Or, if thou wilt not, all but come to me, sweet, and I'll help thee plead insanity...
I am a writer. I can deny all the realities I want.
Where there's a will, there are five hundred relatives.
Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use.
I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.
There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved by a suitable application of high explosives.
Tell me what you need and I'll tell you how to get along without it.
My Reality Check bounced.
Aliens smart enough to visit Earth are smart enough to know not to.
Y'know what? I don't like reality. I think I'll move back into my own little world.
I'm not insane. My reality is just different than yours.
Laugh now, mortal; but just remember -- everything is edible.
Hey! I'm insane, not stupid!
Madness does not always howl. Sometimes, it is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "Hey, is there room in your head for one more?"
Mothers of teens know why some animals eat their young.
Insanity is hereditary. You get it from your kids.
Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.
The main purpose of holding children's parties is to remind yourself that there are children more awful than your own.
Grandchildren are God's reward for not killing your kids.
Jou ate my homework. =(