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Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Chuck Norris Round House Corner 2

Chuck Norris doesn't need Twitter, he's already following you.

Death once had a near-Chuck Norris experience.

Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.

Chuck Norris can cut through hot knife with butter.

Chuck Norris is the only man to punch cyclops between the eyes.

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep at night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

When Chuck Norris throws a boomerang it doesn't dare come back.

The only time Chuck Norris was wrong was when he thought he made a mistake.

Chuck Norris can delete the Recycle Bin.
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How can you tell if you're a good writer

-If you talk to yourself
-If you talk to yourself about talking to yourself
-If, when you talk to yourself, you sometimes speak as if talking to another person(Have you noticed that the word 'deliver' might mean removing someone's liver?)
-If you live off of sugar and caffeine
-If people notice that you check you're e-mail every day for a week, then suddenly disappear of the face of the planet
-If your e-mails are pages long and extremely random
-If when replying to someone's e-mail, you're sometimes so random that you fail to address the original message altogether
-If the letters are starting to wear off on the keys of your keyboard
-If people think you might have A.D.D
-If you think it would be cool having A.D.D
-If you start constantly talking in third person, past tense
-If you think about making lists like this and start giggling for no apparent reason
-If your friends don't even bother to look funny at you anymore when you start giggling for no apparent reason
AND finally, the number one way to tell if you're a good writer: If you worship English 101