"I reject your reality and substitute my own." Adam Savage, Mythbusters
“A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.” – Unknown
“When there's a will, I want to be in it.” – Unknown
We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America , but we haven't a clue as to where thousands of Illegal immigrants and Terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration!
Death is God's way of saying you're fired. Suicide is humans way of saying you can't fire me, I quit
The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.
The spontaneous rally will begin at 1:45.
I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound as the go by.
'It's always in the last place you look' Well DUR! Because you stop looking after you find it! HELLO!
I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you.
"True love is when you don't want to sleep because real life is so much better than a dream"
I'm a little teapot short and stout; here is my handle, here is my...other handle? Shit, now I'm a sugar bowl
I did what they say and chose the road less traveled... Now where the heck am I?
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