To the Internet, My Minions!

Education: That which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understanding.

Clarionet, n. An instrument of torture operated by a person with cotton in his ears. There are two instruments that are worse than a clarionet -- two clarionets.

Idiot, n. A member of a large and powerful tribe whose influence in human affairs has always been dominant and controlling. The Idiot's activity is not confined to any special field of thought or action, but "pervades and regulates the whole." He has the last word in everything; his decision is unappealable. He sets the fashions and opinion of taste, dictates the limitations of speech and circumscribes conduct with a dead-line.

Ocean, n. A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man — who has no gills.

You are not permitted to kill someone who has wronged you, but nothing forbids you to reflect that they are growing older every minute. You are avenged 1440 times a day.

I hope you know that I only hate you because I love you to a point of so much passion it unhinges my soul.

I'm invisible, understand, because people choose not to see me. (isn't that the story of my life)

I'm a writer. Anything you say or do and and will be used in a story.

People often say to me, "I understand what you are talking about intellectually, but I don't really feel it, I don't realize it," and I am apt to reply, "I wonder whether you do understand it intellectually, because if you did you would also feel it." ~ Alan Watts

If you're a singer you lose your voice. A baseball player loses his arm. A writer gets more knowledge, and if he's good, the older he gets, the better he writes.

Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.

Books are always better than real, live boyfriends any day of the week. They don't talk back and they're always there for you. You can have as many of them as you want and they won't complain.

The object of war is not to die for your country, but to make the other bastard die for his.

The scarred man smirked before looking at the occupants in the bed, “Hello, law abiding citizens,” his gaze shifted to the three Uchihas, “Marginally law abiding citizens,” and then his eyes fell on Kisame, “… citizen.”

I think that's how Chicago got started. Bunch of people in New York said, 'Gee, I'm enjoying the crime and the poverty, but it just isn't cold enough. Let's go west.'

"Luck is my middle name," said Rincewind, indistinctly. "Mind you, my first name is Bad."
--Terry Pratchett, Interesting Times