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I'm new at this, so constructive criticism is appreciated. This is for all book nerds out there! Including myself!
For those who know me from dA or ArmorGames, please comment, so I know who you are!

Have fun!!

This site will not be held responsible for any smiles that may be cracked while reading these texts.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

When in doubt, push random buttons!

Well the voices and I took a vote. It's unanimous; you suck.

Okay...so there's this thing called retarded-ness and me and my friends, well...We've gone pro.

Heaven doesn't want me and Hell is afraid I'll take over.

I'd tell you to go to hell, but I work there and really don't want to see you everyday

Someday, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject

Normal people scare me...but not as much as I scare them

You wanna know why God created man before woman? Every masterpiece needs a rough draft!

There are three kinds of people. Those who learn by reading, a few who learn by observation, and the rest who have to test the electric fence for themselves.

You know, you do this annoying thing where you open your mouth and then these things you call words come out. Yeah like that. Stop it

An idiot is a 44th floor window washer who steps back to admire his work

95 percent of people would die if the Jonas Brothers jumped off a building. If your the 5 percent eating popcorn and yelling "JUMP!" then copy and paste this into your profile ;)

The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then proceeds to tell you why it isn't.

We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police

They say the truth will set you free. Then why is it every time I tell the truth, I get sent to my room?

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked up into jet engines.

No one ever says "it's only a game" if their team is winning.

There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved through a suitable application of high explosives.

Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue.

You're slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter.

"I became insane with long intervals of horrible sanity." --Edgar Allen Poe

The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do

If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried before

Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. BE EVIL!

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society

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How can you tell if you're a good writer

-If you talk to yourself
-If you talk to yourself about talking to yourself
-If, when you talk to yourself, you sometimes speak as if talking to another person(Have you noticed that the word 'deliver' might mean removing someone's liver?)
-If you live off of sugar and caffeine
-If people notice that you check you're e-mail every day for a week, then suddenly disappear of the face of the planet
-If your e-mails are pages long and extremely random
-If when replying to someone's e-mail, you're sometimes so random that you fail to address the original message altogether
-If the letters are starting to wear off on the keys of your keyboard
-If people think you might have A.D.D
-If you think it would be cool having A.D.D
-If you start constantly talking in third person, past tense
-If you think about making lists like this and start giggling for no apparent reason
-If your friends don't even bother to look funny at you anymore when you start giggling for no apparent reason
AND finally, the number one way to tell if you're a good writer: If you worship English 101